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Dads (A Personal Story)

Dads (A Personal Story)

I've been blessed with two dads - one, my father - a mighty cool, funny, brilliant and much loved man and papa, who we lost in 1997, when he was just 57. He believed I could do anything. He made even the smallest moments special.

The other, my cherished step-dad, who lovingly treated me like a daughter for 20 years, called to let me know whenever storms were en route to where I live, took my every call asking for advice (even in tax season, as a CPA!) and passed away last month after battling valiantly for three months in ICU.

You might think Father's Day are terrible for me, having said goodbye to two marvelous dads, and one, very recently.

And I'm going to tell you they're not.

Why? A great therapist (thanks, Dr. Tim Young), a great God who promises to always be there for me when my favorite humans leave this earth, and remembering that my dads would want me to enjoy the heck out of this life, work hard, and do things that make a difference in the lives of other people. That's a tall order. I gotta get up early!

Thinking of Father's Day cards I've created for RBTL® inspired by my dad (Charles) or step-dad (Jim) choke me up as I type this, absolutely - you just never want to see the people you love go away, ever - and yet, how blessed am I to have had the closeness and protection of a father for even a moment? Very. And I had TWO!

The big heart bruiser of life is that the people we love are irrevocably temporary, and to remember that is so dedicate spending more time with them while they are on earth, and right away.

If you have a living dad or like-a-dad you adore, call them today and tell them. (Or text, and make it long!) Maybe send a video of you sharing two things you love about them.

I promise: you'll never regret the time you didn't instead spend making a grocery list, doing a load of laundry or mowing the lawn.

You will be so happy. you reached out, and so will THEY - even if doing so felt wildly awkward. (Sometimes awkwardness is just what happens when real feelings brush up against a real heart.)

Awkward doesn't mean 'bad' - it means authentic, and maybe unexpected. That's all. : )

Cherish that moment of being honest with your feelings and gratitude, because you both will benefit tremendously - either in the moment (Yay! Time to hug!), or retrospect ('Oh, you know - that was really nice. I had no idea they felt that way about me.' #warmfuzzy)

After all, love isn't meant to be cool. It's meant to be warm, like a great bowl of soup, a hug after a drought of loneliness, or the sweater you reach for, again and again. You don't even know what the sweater looks like anymore, because you put it on without even thinking about it - you just know you love the thing. It's apart of you.

And if you were to answer the front door wearing that sweater, you'd defend your right to do so to the death, because some things are sacred and looks don't matter more than love.

Treat your dad to ginormous heaps of tender respect, forgiveness and appreciation for the littlest of things.

Remind him why you love him. I did that in the hospital in May, crying, while my step-dad, sedated, fought against his ventilator and arm restraints, attempting to answer me back. I'll never forget it. It still makes me cry. And that's ok with both of us, I think.






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